Does it ever seem like your siblings are luckier in love than you are? Do
you always find yourself in the same role as the responsible one, the
entertainer, or the needy partner when you're in a romantic
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Birth order has a significant impact on your psychological makeup and
attitudes toward romance. Your key to happiness in love can be easily
predicted by evaluating the role you play in your family.
How it works
Birth order analysis is not as straightforward as it may seem. In a family
with four children, the second and third children may not necessarily
behave as middle children. In large families, the oldest child often
behaves more like an only child and the second like a last-born child,
leaving the third child to assume the role of the first-born.
Large gaps of time also affect a child's psychological make up. The third
born child who is five or more years younger than the second born will
perceive himself to be a first-born child. A son born after a string of
daughters, or vice versa, is also likely to adopt the role of first-born.
The only child
The characteristics of a first-born child are magnified in the only child.
You can rely on an only child to be fairly loyal as the loneliness of
their childhood translates into a desire to be true. When only children
set goals, they are able to accomplish things that seem impossible to
But the only child is less of a perfectionist than the oldest child and
more likely to stray in a relationship, especially in a situation where it
seems they will never get caught, such as a solo vacation or while their
mate is out of town for an extended period. The only child tends to play
by the rules but works behind the scenes to bend the rules their way.
Oldest children tend to be leaders. With an inclination toward following
social norms, they tend to find success within established boundaries. And
they take responsibility, sticking to the rules.
First-born children are more likely than others to marry their childhood
sweethearts. They are also the more likely to stay in relationships that
aren't working and try to fix things. If your soulmate is a first born,
you are in a relationship that has a good chance of lasting a lifetime.
Well-adjusted middle children occupy the happy middle. Because they are
part of a hierarchy, they learn negotiating tactics very well. If your
manager at work is a middle child, expect the best treatment your company
has to offer.
Middle children either marry very early (in an effort to be first at
something) or late in life when they have found the perfect match. And
they are great lovers; their desire to please their partner comes from an
upbringing of learning how to cooperate and coexist. But be forewarned:
Although they may seem generous and conciliatory most of the time, middle
children are the fiercest competitors.
Far from being the runt of the litter, the youngest child is usually the
most outgoing. They are also very low-maintenance lovers. Once in a
relationship, it doesn't take much to keep a youngest child interested.
But while they may be competent lovers and affectionate spouses, don't
ever try to dominate them.
Last-born children live to question authority. Far from parroting the
ideas of others, look for them to be innovators in technology and fashion.
The youngest child also has the best sense of humor in the family.
This is the child born into a family after a miscarriage, stillbirth or
child who died as an infant. A ghost child combines the competitive
qualities of the middle child with the responsibility attributes of the
Ghost children are very spiritual partners, melding effortlessly with
almost any person who desires them. The problems in a ghost child's
relationships usually center on their ambiguous attitude toward commitment
and a tendency to end things quite suddenly.
The firstborn of a set of twins does not necessarily take on the role of
the first-born child. Twins establish their own hierarchies in childhood
and suddenly, usually between ages 11 and 22, switch into the opposite
roles. One twin will exhibit characteristics of a first-born child and the
other will adopt the role of a youngest child.
The switch will usually be triggered by a traumatic or important event,
such as a death in the family or a move to a new city. Once the switch
happens, it is permanent. Twins usually make understanding partners who
want to sample what the world has to offer.