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How to talk about women and be politically correct:
She does not:
Have Big Hooters.
She is:
Over Mammified.
She is not:
Quiet.
She is:
A Conversational Minimalist
She is not:
Ditzy
She suffers from:
Minimal Cranial Development.
Her swimsuit does not:
Ride up on her.
She experiences:
Crack exploration.
You do not:
Stare at her cleavage
You:
Gaze out over silicon valley.
She does not:
order sissy drinks
She is:
Alcoholically overfruited
She does not:
Spend a lot of time on her hair.
She is:
Scalp-centered.
She will never:
Have saggy breasts.
She will become:
Mammarly relaxed.
She does not:
Have a rich daddy
She is a:
Recipient of a parental asset infusion.
She is not:
Frigid.
She suffers from:
Permanent virginity
You do not:
Try to give her the bone.
You attempt to provide her with a:
Calcium supplement.
She is not:
A Bad dancer.
She is:
Rhythmically challenged.
Her thighs are not:
Fat
Her upper legs do have:
Excellent calorie retention.
You do not:
Buy her a drink.
You initiate an:
Alcohol-for-conversation exchange.
She is not:
Short.
She is:
Anatomically compact.
She does not:
Do a lot of shopping.
She is an:
Economic overachiever
You do not:
Undress her with your eyes.
You have an:
Introspective pornographic moment.
She does not:
Have too many outfits
She has achieved:
Full closet potential.
She does not:
Talk too much.
She is:
Verbally expressive.
She does not:
have a hot body.
She is:
Physically combustible
She is not:
Dieting.
She is having a:
Personal downsizing.
She does not:
Cry at sappy movies
She suffers from:
Cinematic Breakdowns.
She does not wear:
A Lot of make-up.
She is:
Cosmetically enhanced.
You do not:
Want to kiss her.
You want to become:
Facially conjoined.
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